Have you ever been in a conflict where you were scared to do anything? Well in the book The Hobbit, J.R.R. Tolkien is very good at moving a story forward by using a conflict. My favorite one is when the dwarves, Bilbo, and Gandalf were chased up a tree, in the forest, by a immense pack of vicious wolves. If that happened to me I don't know what I do! Especially when the fire starts and goblins come. That would just be a terrifying scene! Could you imagine looking down at the wolves growling at you because they want to kill you? That would be horrible! That's the time you want some miraculous to happen, which it definitely did. Gandalf made an incantation with his wand and shot up a streak of light that told the Great eagle to come and save them all from the trees. Except on thing happened which was definitely a problem. Bilbo had to grab on to Dori's ankles! I would be scared from being held in the talons of a great eagle, but dangling for dear life on a poor dwarves ankles? That would just ruin me! I wouldn't be able to do just because how scared I was. However, once I was dropped off, I would be happy by the first meal I saw.
This was a good conflict, and it certainly did move the story forward. You have a very engaging voice in your response, and that is also entertaining for me! I think you might have focused a little more on the conflict between the two characters: wargs & goblins vs. dwarf troupe. That would have been more focused on the question of conflict than the eagle rescue. Also, take a minute to reread your work, and you will find errors of omission. Good title and good job!
Mrs. Best
March 12, 2010
One Horrid Night
(109-122)
Have you ever been in a conflict where you were scared to do anything? Well in the book The Hobbit, J.R.R. Tolkien is very good at moving a story forward by using a conflict. My favorite one is when the dwarves, Bilbo, and Gandalf were chased up a tree, in the forest, by a immense pack of vicious wolves. If that happened to me I don't know what I do! Especially when the fire starts and goblins come. That would just be a terrifying scene! Could you imagine looking down at the wolves growling at you because they want to kill you? That would be horrible! That's the time you want some miraculous to happen, which it definitely did. Gandalf made an incantation with his wand and shot up a streak of light that told the Great eagle to come and save them all from the trees. Except on thing happened which was definitely a problem. Bilbo had to grab on to Dori's ankles! I would be scared from being held in the talons of a great eagle, but dangling for dear life on a poor dwarves ankles? That would just ruin me! I wouldn't be able to do just because how scared I was. However, once I was dropped off, I would be happy by the first meal I saw.
This was a good conflict, and it certainly did move the story forward. You have a very engaging voice in your response, and that is also entertaining for me! I think you might have focused a little more on the conflict between the two characters: wargs & goblins vs. dwarf troupe. That would have been more focused on the question of conflict than the eagle rescue. Also, take a minute to reread your work, and you will find errors of omission. Good title and good job!
Mrs. Best